crunch_noir's Journal

boosh fic
"The toast fell from his hand and landed, buttered-side down, on the floor."

The toast fell from his hand and landed, buttered-side down, on the floor. ‘Oh shit’ noel remarked, as the butter began to ooze into the carpet. He searched quickly for a sponge, or something to clean it up with. It was a race against time to get it clean before his housemate and lover Julian realised what had happened. But it was too late. Noel was just at the sink and had grabbed a wet cloth when he felt Julian’s melancholy eyes staring at him and the mess on the floor. ‘Look at the state of this Noel! Haven’t I told you to always use a fucking plate?’ Julian hated mess. Despite his unruly hair and scruffy attire, Julian was an incredibly clean man. Noel knew this and he tried to adhere to Julian’s clean-freak requests to ‘always use a plate’ or to ‘wash the bedding once a week’ but noel just wasn’t that sort of person. Julian grabbed him and fiercely pulled noel towards him ‘WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT USING A FUCKING PLATE?’ Julian had meant this as a rhetorical question but had got a response from noel, though it had not been the of the kind he might of been expecting. He felt a bulge in the front of Noel’s trousers pressing against his thigh, he looked down in confusion and when he returned his gaze to Noel’s face, there was an expression of wild glee. Julian was confused, ‘was noel mocking him? Was he enjoying this ruff treatment?’ But before Julian could answer those questions in his mind noel had thrust himself onto Julian in a wild embrace and was sliding his tongue into Julian’s mouth. All thoughts of toast where instantly forgotten. Julian kissed back, delving his tongue deep into Noel’s month, which made Noel release a deep guttural moan. Julian rapped his arms around Noel’s slight frame and pulled him closer. Then suddenly Julian stopped, he stood still and stared at the grease and crumb infused pile beneath his feet. But noel wouldn’t let Julian linger over the mess. He unzipped Julian’s trousers in one swift movement and expertly slipped his hand into his briefs. Julian looked back at noel, torn between his two needs, cleaning and sex with Noel. He chose the latter.
He released a grunt as noel grabbed his now painfully erect penis. Julian scrabbled to get a grip on the bottom of noels t-shirt but once he’d got a hold he removed it in one movement. Next he undid Noel’s belt and unzipped his skin tight jeans. Noel then realised his grip on Julian so that he could remove his trousers, ‘Julian never did get the hang of this’ he thought to himself and laughed. Julian took advantage of noel’s preoccupation to remove his own top, trousers and underpants. That was over in a flash and Noel and Julian became entwined once again, lips against lips. Then suddenly, in a change of tactic, Julian turned noel around and pushed him over the kitchen counter. Noel gasped in surprised and slightly winced in pain at the force but Julian wasn’t listening, he was like a man possessed. He searched around the kitchen with his eyes for any form of lubrication and immediately came across a tub of butter left out on the side. Scooping a small amount onto his fingers, he inserted one inside of noel’s arsehole. Noel whimpered with pleasure as Julian inserted a second finger. Then without warning he swiftly removed his fingers and thrust into noel. Noel squealed in a mixture of surprise, pain and delight. And before he could get used to the sensation Julian pulled out and thrust a second time into noel, that time entering him fully right down to the base of his cock. Noel screeched again, he had never really got used to the size of Julian. This time Julian left himself inside for a few moments, treasuring the warmth that was engulfing his throbbing member. Noel wriggled slightly in an attempt to get Julian to start moving and it work. Julian began to pump in and out of noel rhythmically. On his third thrust Julian brushed against Noels prostrate and noel felted a burst of orgasmic pleasure. With each thrust they were pushed closer to the edge. Noel couldn’t take anymore and shot his loads over the kitchen surface and on seeing that he came as well. He then pulled out of Noel and looked around the kitchen. Not only was there butter and crumbs in the carpet but there was now cum all over the surface. Noel caught his breath then turned around and kissed noel chastely on the cheek. ‘Lets clean this up then’ said noel, ‘I promise I won’t do it again’. Julian looked around once more, raised an eyebrow and then replied, ‘well, I don’t mind if we do that more often’.

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